I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
love makes seman taste better
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
