were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
