I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
