I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
