turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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