it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
