we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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