She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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