420 ftw
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
