Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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