dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
