i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
