I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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