the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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