"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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