I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Slut skills are useful in every country.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
