You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
it's great music for shaving your balls
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize