Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
i believe in u and ur pee
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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