I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
