mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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