just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
