just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
