doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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