Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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