"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
You left your phone here
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