this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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