Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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