Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
