He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
