How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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