Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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