he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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