Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
