My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
