hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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