everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
