Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
