Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize
