Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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