"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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