I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
