Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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