dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Randomize
