well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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