I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Randomize