I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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