Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
