Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry Smexysk8rchick hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(952): View more from Minnesota

I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur

(612): View more from Minnesota

Nice use of current day folklore

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(816): View more from Missouri

I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.

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(770): View more from Georgia

One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.

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(406): View more from Montana

Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry

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(727): View more from Florida

I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.

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