***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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