i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
