Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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